Monday, 18 May 2015 21:01

2009- Honored by Vallejo Gay Network

 

pair banner

A few years back we were at something called the "Unity Fair" in Vallejo and were asked to pose for some pictures. We didn't really understand what they were for at the time but a year or so later, the Vallejo Gay Network contacted us and asked if they could use one of those pics on a banner they were sponsoring. We were honored of course and said yes. The banner has been up for severall years now and I wanted to get some pics before they came down. About a year or so after this video was taken, the banners had come down. I'm not sure what happened to them after that. I would love to have had this one!

 

Published in Fifties
Sunday, 29 March 2015 18:14

1993- Move to Vallejo & Our First Home

outriggermodel

 

By 1993, Milton and I had lived together on Waller Street for 12 years. We loved it there but had talked about buying a home for years. We had looked at homes as far away as Sacramento. We didn't really have much for a down payment and knew we probably couldn't afford to stay in San Francisco. The North Bay, Marin, San Rafael, and other cities along the 101 corridor north of the Golden Gate Bridge were over our budget, too as was anything South of San Francisco to San Jose on 101 or 280. 

Before my mom had died, she had been very involved in Darlene's life and making sure she had a home for her kids, Chris and Misty. She had helped Darlene buy houses several times at that point, in Seattle with Chuck and then in Spokane years later. She gave Roger a piece of land outside Spokane, too, and gave me an empty lot in a run down part of Spokane. 

When my mom died, George brought forth an old will she had written many years previously when Darlene still lived in Spokane and Chris and Misty were still little kids. At that time, mom was going to have gall bladder surgery and her concerns about that prompted her to write a will at that time that divided her estate between her four kids, Jim, Darlene, Roger and I and her grandkids, Chris and Misty. Before she had died, she had written another will by hand that she thought was valid because it was all in her handwriting with her signature that divided her estate between just her own kids, Jim, Darlene, Roger and I. For whatever reason, George or an attorney didn't think the handwritten will was valid. The estate was divided between her kids and two grandkids.

Jim Tarbert had a fit about mom's will and shamefully misconstrued and twisted what had happened, implying that my Mother somehow cared more about Darlene's kids than his kids, Kathy and Deanna. Jim had always seemed to dislike my mom and would often make disparaging remarks about her. It was never clear why he had so much animosity toward her- maybe because she divorced his dad? Jim was always very opinionated and on the fringe of the far right of the Republican party and seemed to dislike anyone that wouldn't agree with everything he said. 

Of course, mom loved Kathy and Deanna but the real reason for them not being in the old will from her gallbladder surgery was simply because Kathy and Deanna had secure futures. Chris and Misty did not. Mom knew that Jim and Danise would provide well for their two children. Darlene, up to the time of the gallbladder surgery, had been on government assistance at times and was always barely scraping by. There were times that she could not even handle her own kids and they lived with George and Mom for a time and Chris even ended up living with Milton and I for a couple of years. Jim knew all this but he lied to his own daughters and led them to believe that mom just didn't care about them as much as Chris and Misty. 

Regardless, when all was said and done, I eventually sold the lot in Spokane and with the few thousand from my mom's estate, Milton and I now had enough money for a possible down payment on a house. I was determined not to make the same mistake I had made with my dad's estate, burning through about $10,000 on a one minute movie project. I was determined to buy a house.

During this time, I was still working as the "admission's nurse," which utilized my computer program, MacNursing, at Western Psychiatric Center in Saint Francis Hospital. Milton and I had gone out to Hercules, which is about twenty miles outside of San Francisco on interstate 80, to look at a two bedroom condo we could afford. It was like a small apartment with a detached, single car garage. It was the best thing for the money that we had seen at that point but Milton was not that enthusiastic about it and I wanted to get another opinion before we jumped in. 

Marni was one of the unit secretaries on the psych unit and a good friend. She was married to Brett, who was in the navy. She lived with her husband, Brett, and two of her kids with Brett, on Treasure Island in military housing there. She and I made plans to go out to Hercules so she could give me her opinion about the condo we were considering. 

Marni did not seem impressed with the condo. It was tiny and in a large complex that had the potential for being pretty awful if a lot of families with kids moved in. There was only a tiny, concrete patio area outside with enough space for a couple chairs. If it were raining, one would definitely get wet, running from the detached garage into the house. 

Since we were already in Hercules, and I knew of another condo development in Vallejo I wanted to look at, Marni and I drove across the Carquinez Bridge. The condo development I wanted to see was located, overlooking the Carquinez Straights. We found it easily and took a look. It was really not very impressive. The quality of the construction obviously left much to be desired even though it was brand new. There was no actual view from the units that were available. The units were about the same size as the units in Hercules. 

As we were leaving the condo, there were signs along the way pointing to other developments. It was still fairly early in the day and I asked Marni if she wanted to look at any of the others. We followed some signs pointing to a new development called "Clearpointe." As we drove up Outrigger Street, we could see the homes come into view. At first, I thought they appeared very large and I thought there was no way that Milton and I would be able to afford such a large home but then we realized that each building was actually two homes. They were townhouses. Marni and I took a look. 

There were three different floor plans. All had two car garages. The smallest unit was three bedrooms with 2.5 baths and about 1500 square feet. The next step up was a three bedrooms with an upstairs loft area. The largest unit was four bedrooms. Marni and I focused on the least expensive three bedroom. 

The models were beautifully done. The quality of the construction was much better than the two condos we had seen earlier. The floor plans were sensible and made good use of space. The price was slightly over the budge that Milton and I had thought we could afford. Instead of just a small patio area, each of these townhouses came with it's own lot with a back yard and a front yard. 

Marni and I talked about how nice the Clearpointe development was as we drove back towards Treasure Island and San Francisco. At that time, Marni had not really said much about buying a place herself. She had just come with me to give me her opinion about the condos I have looked at previously. I was shocked the next day at work when she came into the admissions office where I was working and asked, "Guess what Brett and I did this morning." She had taken Brett out to look at the Clearpointe homes and they had taken advantage of an offer of a dollar down for military families!! They had bought a home!!

It was very exciting for me to hear about Marni and Brett getting such a great deal. I wondered if Milton and I could use his military service to get a similar deal. That was not going to be the case, though. To get a Veterans Administration loan, it would have required that we were married and at that time, there was no where in the country that gay men could marry. We looked into other possibilities and using the money I had received from selling the lot in Spokane and the money from my mom's estate, we could scrape together enough for a down payment. I don't know if it was because we were gay or because of our low downpayment or because of our income or just because it was all they had left, but the lot the real estate developer told us we could afford, was at the bottom of a hill with another home above it. It was not ideal in many ways but it was still the best home we had seen for what we could afford and so we signed the papers. 

After signing the papers, I had nightmares about the house we were going to be moving to. I dreamed of the hillside sliding down onto the house and burying us in mud. It was a very stressful time from when we signed the papers to when we actually got the keys to move in which took a few months. Straight people could just put a dollar down and move in and soon as they could get a moving truck. Gay people needed to jump through many more hoops. 

Periodically, we would drive out to Vallejo and see what stage of construction they were in. We watched the foundation go in. We watched the walls go up. We got to pick out countertops and carpet, although we could only afford the cheapest options at that time. Eventually we would replace the countertops with granite and replace the linoleum with tile and replace the carpet with maple but that was some years off. We were just so excited to have our first home!!!

 

outriggerlotMilton looking down at our site from hillside

 

outriggerfoundationFrom side of house looking toward hillside

 

homefromkitchenLooking through dining area toward stairs from kitchen

 

homefromlivingroomDining area ceiling from living room

 

outriggerdirtFrom the front yard before siding put on house

 

outrigger buildingView from our neighbors driveway

outriggerbuilt

Milton and I standing in front of our garage

 

outriggerfrontpastOur front door

 

 

VallejohomebuildingpatioConstructing our patio one brick at a time

 

JPEG 0206One of our first gardens

 

 

Published in Forties

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Black Men in Oils- Click to read story
Me in my 20's in 1970's- Click for story.
Grandview- Click for story
Cockettes & Angels of Light- Click for story
2014- Road trip to San Diego- Click for story.
Palouse- Click for story
2005 Darlene Visit for Gay Pride- Click for story.
1982-1993 Waller Street- Click to read story.
The Psychedelic Experience- Click to read story.
2005- Darlene Visits for Gay Pride- Click to read story.
Forbidden Dreams of Love- Click for story.
1973- Psych Tech Program- Click for story.
4th Grade- Click for story.
Me in first grade- Click for story.
1957-1958 1st Grade- Click to read story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
Beatle haircut- Click for story.
1974- First Trip to Europe- Click to read story.
My Dad's Family- Click for story.
1974- On Larkin Street- Click for story.
My Mother- Click for more photos.
Women in Oils- Click for story
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click for story.
1970's Promiscuity- Click for story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
Me in 3rd grade- Click for story.
1958-1959- 3rd Grade- Click to read story.
5th Grade in Abilene Tx- Click for story
Amber- Click to read story.
Gay Disco 70's- Click for story
Where I was born- Click for story.
Darlene Marries Chuck- Click for story.
Earthquake! Click to read story.
Photos of Dad & His Family- Click for story.
1964- Luv Please- Click for story.
Click to read "Introduction."
Escondido 1960's- Click for story
1973 "You have to be hurt..." Click to read the story.
Summer of Love- Click to read story.
Second Gay Cruise- Click for story.
1967- Summer of Love- Click to read story.
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click to read story.

Article

01. Introduction

03- Dads Family

03- Photos of my Father and his family

04- My Mother's Family

04- Photos of my Mom

04- Video of my Mom

04- Walling Family Reunions

04-Audio Files of My Mom

04. Billie

04. Ole

04.1. Forbidden Dreams of Love

04.2. Flames of Forbidden Love

04.3 Mom Writing Her Life Story

05- Jim Tarbert

05. Roger

1950's Grandview to Toppenish

1957-1958 1st Grade

1958-1959- Third Grade

1959- Palouse

1961- 4th Grade- Last time I wore a dress

1962- Abilene

1963- Escondido- Early 60's

1964- Darlene Marries Chuck

1964- My Beatle Haircut

1964-The Luv Please

1965 or 1966- Steve Castle

1965- In Foster Care

1966 Living with Darlene & Chuck in Seattle

1967- Juvenile Hall

1976- I Praise Thee (poem to Stanley)

1976- My Second Lover, Stanley Dunne

1976- Paul McCartney and Wings

1976-1330 Bush Street #9J

1977- 1667 Haight Street

1977- Trip to San Diego with Mary Jo

1977-1980- Tumultuous Relationship with John Perry

1978- 525 Haight Street

1979- September- Dad is Murdered

1980's- AIDS- Death and Dying

1980- Winter- First Trip to New York

1980- Word, Sound and Power

1981- Milton- Falling in Love

1982-1993 465 Waller Street

1982-1994 Computers to MacNursing

1984- 33rd Birthday

1985- Graduation from Nursing School

1985- Trip to Hawaii (Oahu)

1988- MIdnight Caller

1989- Earthquake!

1991- Aug 10th- Mom Passes Away

1991- Black Males in Oils

1991- Crack of My Life

1993- Move to Vallejo & Our First Home

1995-1. Road Trip to Washington

1995-2. Surprise Trip to Vegas

1995-3. Grandmother Rogers & Aunts Visit Darlene's

1995-4. Amber

1998- Camping at Russian River

2000 -Thoughts about Progressive Christians

2000- Resignation from John George

2001- April- Trip to Cancun

2001- Peace and Justice

2001- September 11th

2002- April-Puerto Vallarta & Blue Bay Getaway

2002- Nov 12th- My Stepfather, George McHenry Passes Away

2003- Trip to D.C. and N.Y.

2004- Feb- Road Trip to Baha Mexico

2004- Walling Family Reunion in Spokane

2005- Christmas Poem

2005- Darlene Visit for Pride Celebration

2005- Trip to Orlando

2005-1. Europe- London

2005-2. Europe- Paris

2005-3. Europe- Venice

2005-4. Europe- Florence

2005-5. Europe- Rome

2005-6. Europe- Athens

2005-7. Knee Surgery & Tongue Biopsy

2006 Christmas Poem

2006- February 23- Times Herald

2006- Palm Springs White Party

2006- Trip to Seattle

2006-July 8th Solano Peace and Justice Coalition BBQ

2007- Feb- Carnival Destiny- Our First Cruise

2007- Tre and Casey Visit

2008- Aug 15-18 Spokane Visit

2008- Psycho Song

2009- Honored by Vallejo Gay Network

2009- Women in Oils

2010 Christmas Poem

2010- Feb. R.C. Mariner of the Seas Mexican Riviera Cruise

2010- June 24- Badlands

2010- Trip to Seattle

2010-1. Europe- Amsterdam

2010-2. Europe- Paris

2010-3. Europe- Barcelona & Sitges

2010-4. Europe- Madrid

2011-1. Feb. My Fabulous 60th Birthday Weekend

2011-2. April- L.A., Palm Springs & "The White Party"

2011-3. Poem- Girl From Medical Lake

2011-4. Old Man Dancing

2011-5. May- Misty and Alex Visit

2011-6. August- Darlene and Sean's Visit

2011-7. Alex 16-18 & Pics

2012- March- Carnival Splendor Mexican Riviera with Family

2013- Wedding

2014- Christmas Poem

2014- First Gay Cruise

2014- September Road Trip to San Diego

2015- Seasonal Affective Blues

2015- Second Gay Cruise

2015- War on Christmas poem

2015-"Badlands" and Gay Bar Etiquette

2015-September 8. Political History

2016 Do Not Speak for Gay Males

2016- April- Palm Springs RV Adventure

4/4/2016- Not Going Along to Get Along

9/4/15- Liberals vs Conservatives

My Mother- Click for more photos.
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click for story.
Summer of Love- Click to read story.
4th Grade- Click for story.
1974- On Larkin Street- Click for story.
Second Gay Cruise- Click for story.
2005 Darlene Visit for Gay Pride- Click for story.
Amber- Click to read story.
Black Men in Oils- Click to read story
Beatle haircut- Click for story.
5th Grade in Abilene Tx- Click for story
Photos of Dad & His Family- Click for story.
Me in 3rd grade- Click for story.
Darlene Marries Chuck- Click for story.
1973- Psych Tech Program- Click for story.
Me in first grade- Click for story.
Where I was born- Click for story.
Earthquake! Click to read story.
Cockettes & Angels of Light- Click for story
Palouse- Click for story
1970's Promiscuity- Click for story.
1958-1959- 3rd Grade- Click to read story.
1957-1958 1st Grade- Click to read story.
My Dad's Family- Click for story.
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click to read story.
Grandview- Click for story
Women in Oils- Click for story
1967- Summer of Love- Click to read story.
2005- Darlene Visits for Gay Pride- Click to read story.
Click to read "Introduction."
The Psychedelic Experience- Click to read story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
1964- Luv Please- Click for story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
Me in my 20's in 1970's- Click for story.
Gay Disco 70's- Click for story
2014- Road trip to San Diego- Click for story.
1973 "You have to be hurt..." Click to read the story.
Escondido 1960's- Click for story
Forbidden Dreams of Love- Click for story.
1982-1993 Waller Street- Click to read story.
1974- First Trip to Europe- Click to read story.