Tuesday, 07 July 2015 23:24

2002- Nov 12th- My Stepfather, George McHenry Passes Away

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My Mother had met George when I was in the fourth grade, when we were living in Spokane. My aunt, Billie, introduced her to George at a square dance. I don't know that she ever felt the same way about him as she did about my Dad. I think my Father was a more youthful, passionate love, while George was more of a mature, pragmatic kind of love. My dad was an uneducated, volatile, binge drinking alcoholic, womanizer, while George had a college education, was very stable and didn't drink or smoke. George was a mountaineer and belonged to the Sierra Club. 

George worked as an aeronautics engineer and was involved in building missiles or missile silos in Spokane. I believe he was working for either Convair or General Dynamics at that time. He moved to Abilene Texas to work on missile's or missile silo's there. Much of his work was considered "classified' or "secret" as it involved our missile defense system. 

Roger was sent to Arkansas around this time. He has said that be believed Mom wanted to get him "out of the way" because he was so disruptive at that time and she didn't want him to jeopardize her relationship with George. i really don't know that this is necessarily true, but it is true that Roger was a very angry child and was difficult for Mom to control at times. 

My Mom and I took a train from Spokane to Abilene. At that age, I just thought we were going to visit George in Abilene, but then they enrolled me in school there. After a few days, I came home from school one day and Mom showed me her wedding ring. I started crying and was pretty inconsolable. Of course, it was unlikely that my Mother and Father would ever get back together since he already had three kids by another wife, but somehow, my Mother marrying George just seemed more "final" or something. 

Eventually, Roger, came to live with us in Abilene and Darlene came there, too. It was a pretty horrible place. It was the worst place that I have ever lived in my lifetime. The children we rode the school bus with were horrible. I had grown up in integrated schools with relatively civilized kids. It was shocking to see how stupid and hateful kids were in Abilene. Schools were still segregated there and the black kids that rode the school bus got off at one stop at an old country school house, while the white kids rode into town to the new, modern school. I speak of all this in more detail elsewhere on this site in an article titled, "Abilene." 

George had five girls from a previous marriage, Sandy, Barbara, Carol, Connie, and Georgie. They all lived in San Diego. George's parents lived in a suburb of San Diego, too. 

My Mom and George got along well throughout their marriage. They did have occasional disagreements but George treated my Mother with much respect. Mom always felt like she had to be the "buffer"  between George and us kids. 

When I was in my late teens or early twenties, at some point that i was probably staying with my Mom and George briefly at an apartment complex in Southern California, my African-American friend, Mary Jo, came to visit. My Mother did not want her to come into the house and she implied that George would not want her to because she was black. 

After I was grown and was living with Milton, Mom would come and visit from time to time for several years. George never came with her. I always thought the reason he didn't stay with us was because Milton was African-American. I always assumed George was a bit racist. He had grown up in Chicago and i think Chicago is pretty infamous about the racism there.

George and I were with my Mother when she passed away. As she was taking her last breaths, I started freaking out. Even though, I knew intellectually, that there was no point in a crash cart, I started yelling for the nurses to come quickly. George was crying and reminded me that there was no point and I realized he was right. 

George remarried within about six months to a woman named Darlene, that he had met at a mountaineering club. I don't know if he had met Darlene prior to Mom passing away or after she passed away. It did seem like his relationship and then marriage to her was very quick after my Mother's passing. It is my opinion that straight men that are used to women taking care of them all their lives, don't do very well on their own. 

The shocking thing to me was that after George married Darlene, he contacted me and said that they wanted to visit Milton and I on their way to Southern California. He had bought a truck and a fifth-wheel and he and Darlene had now become "snowbirds." He and Darlene did come to visit and did stay overnight in our home and they seemed to get along with Milton just fine. We all went out to dinner, too. So, to this day, I don't know if George was really as racist as my Mom implied or if that was just her being a "buffer" or if it was all just due to her own racism? 

I don't know how long it was that George and Darlene were married before George had his stroke. I know he was pretty sick at the end. Sadly, he had not prepared a will and so Darlene inherited everything and none of George's five girls received a dime from his estate. 

When i flew up to Yakima for the service, (George was cremated), I had to fly a small aircraft into Yakima on the last leg of the flight. Barbie was on the same flight. I approached her in the airport. It was the first time I had seen her in many years. In the picture below, from left to right is Darlene's son, Larry (Rocky) Noonan; Darlene's daughter-in-law, married to Chris Tasker, Kristen; Then my cousin, Nola; Darlene is next to her. I think that is her son, Chris, behind her and Gail next to her. In front of them is Wynter. Next to Gail is George's daughter, Carol. I am standing behind her and George's girl, Connie or Georgie. That must be either Connie or Georgie behind. Then Sandy. Then Barbie. 

 

georgesfuneralRocky, Kristen, Nola, Darlene, Chris, Gail, Wynter, Carol, Me, Connie, Georgie, Sandy, Barbie

 

nolamegaildarleneatgeorgesfuneralNola, me, Gail, Darlene at George's Funeral

 

georgebarbieBarbie

 

georgeBetterMcHenryGirlsSandie, Carol, Barbie, Connie and Georgie

 

georgeCarolCarol

 

georgeConnieConnie

 

georgeSandieSandie

 

GeorgieGeorgie

Read 5132 times Last modified on Sunday, 08 May 2016 02:52

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Women in Oils- Click for story
The Psychedelic Experience- Click to read story.
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click for story.
My Dad's Family- Click for story.
1964- Luv Please- Click for story.
1973- Psych Tech Program- Click for story.
Gay Disco 70's- Click for story
Beatle haircut- Click for story.
Second Gay Cruise- Click for story.
Cockettes & Angels of Light- Click for story
Grandview- Click for story
Earthquake! Click to read story.
Forbidden Dreams of Love- Click for story.
Escondido 1960's- Click for story
1973 "You have to be hurt..." Click to read the story.
1982-1993 Waller Street- Click to read story.
Palouse- Click for story
Amber- Click to read story.
1970's Promiscuity- Click for story.
2005- Darlene Visits for Gay Pride- Click to read story.
Summer of Love- Click to read story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
Me in 3rd grade- Click for story.
My Mother- Click for more photos.
Me in my 20's in 1970's- Click for story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
Darlene Marries Chuck- Click for story.
1958-1959- 3rd Grade- Click to read story.
Black Men in Oils- Click to read story
Click to read "Introduction."
2014- Road trip to San Diego- Click for story.
1974- On Larkin Street- Click for story.
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click to read story.
4th Grade- Click for story.
Photos of Dad & His Family- Click for story.
Me in first grade- Click for story.
5th Grade in Abilene Tx- Click for story
1957-1958 1st Grade- Click to read story.
Where I was born- Click for story.
1974- First Trip to Europe- Click to read story.
2005 Darlene Visit for Gay Pride- Click for story.
1967- Summer of Love- Click to read story.

Article

01. Introduction

03- Dads Family

03- Photos of my Father and his family

04- My Mother's Family

04- Photos of my Mom

04- Video of my Mom

04- Walling Family Reunions

04-Audio Files of My Mom

04. Billie

04. Ole

04.1. Forbidden Dreams of Love

04.2. Flames of Forbidden Love

04.3 Mom Writing Her Life Story

05- Jim Tarbert

05. Roger

1950's Grandview to Toppenish

1957-1958 1st Grade

1958-1959- Third Grade

1959- Palouse

1961- 4th Grade- Last time I wore a dress

1962- Abilene

1963- Escondido- Early 60's

1964- Darlene Marries Chuck

1964- My Beatle Haircut

1964-The Luv Please

1965 or 1966- Steve Castle

1965- In Foster Care

1966 Living with Darlene & Chuck in Seattle

1967- Juvenile Hall

1976- I Praise Thee (poem to Stanley)

1976- My Second Lover, Stanley Dunne

1976- Paul McCartney and Wings

1976-1330 Bush Street #9J

1977- 1667 Haight Street

1977- Trip to San Diego with Mary Jo

1977-1980- Tumultuous Relationship with John Perry

1978- 525 Haight Street

1979- September- Dad is Murdered

1980's- AIDS- Death and Dying

1980- Winter- First Trip to New York

1980- Word, Sound and Power

1981- Milton- Falling in Love

1982-1993 465 Waller Street

1982-1994 Computers to MacNursing

1984- 33rd Birthday

1985- Graduation from Nursing School

1985- Trip to Hawaii (Oahu)

1988- MIdnight Caller

1989- Earthquake!

1991- Aug 10th- Mom Passes Away

1991- Black Males in Oils

1991- Crack of My Life

1993- Move to Vallejo & Our First Home

1995-1. Road Trip to Washington

1995-2. Surprise Trip to Vegas

1995-3. Grandmother Rogers & Aunts Visit Darlene's

1995-4. Amber

1998- Camping at Russian River

2000 -Thoughts about Progressive Christians

2000- Resignation from John George

2001- April- Trip to Cancun

2001- Peace and Justice

2001- September 11th

2002- April-Puerto Vallarta & Blue Bay Getaway

2002- Nov 12th- My Stepfather, George McHenry Passes Away

2003- Trip to D.C. and N.Y.

2004- Feb- Road Trip to Baha Mexico

2004- Walling Family Reunion in Spokane

2005- Christmas Poem

2005- Darlene Visit for Pride Celebration

2005- Trip to Orlando

2005-1. Europe- London

2005-2. Europe- Paris

2005-3. Europe- Venice

2005-4. Europe- Florence

2005-5. Europe- Rome

2005-6. Europe- Athens

2005-7. Knee Surgery & Tongue Biopsy

2006 Christmas Poem

2006- February 23- Times Herald

2006- Palm Springs White Party

2006- Trip to Seattle

2006-July 8th Solano Peace and Justice Coalition BBQ

2007- Feb- Carnival Destiny- Our First Cruise

2007- Tre and Casey Visit

2008- Aug 15-18 Spokane Visit

2008- Psycho Song

2009- Honored by Vallejo Gay Network

2009- Women in Oils

2010 Christmas Poem

2010- Feb. R.C. Mariner of the Seas Mexican Riviera Cruise

2010- June 24- Badlands

2010- Trip to Seattle

2010-1. Europe- Amsterdam

2010-2. Europe- Paris

2010-3. Europe- Barcelona & Sitges

2010-4. Europe- Madrid

2011-1. Feb. My Fabulous 60th Birthday Weekend

2011-2. April- L.A., Palm Springs & "The White Party"

2011-3. Poem- Girl From Medical Lake

2011-4. Old Man Dancing

2011-5. May- Misty and Alex Visit

2011-6. August- Darlene and Sean's Visit

2011-7. Alex 16-18 & Pics

2012- March- Carnival Splendor Mexican Riviera with Family

2013- Wedding

2014- Christmas Poem

2014- First Gay Cruise

2014- September Road Trip to San Diego

2015- Seasonal Affective Blues

2015- Second Gay Cruise

2015- War on Christmas poem

2015-"Badlands" and Gay Bar Etiquette

2015-September 8. Political History

2016 Do Not Speak for Gay Males

2016- April- Palm Springs RV Adventure

4/4/2016- Not Going Along to Get Along

9/4/15- Liberals vs Conservatives

Black Men in Oils- Click to read story
Escondido 1960's- Click for story
Cockettes & Angels of Light- Click for story
1964- Luv Please- Click for story.
Palouse- Click for story
Me in my 20's in 1970's- Click for story.
1973- Psych Tech Program- Click for story.
Click to read "Introduction."
1982-1993 Waller Street- Click to read story.
Forbidden Dreams of Love- Click for story.
Women in Oils- Click for story
Beatle haircut- Click for story.
Darlene Marries Chuck- Click for story.
Gay Disco 70's- Click for story
Photos of Dad & His Family- Click for story.
1957-1958 1st Grade- Click to read story.
Grandview- Click for story
Amber- Click to read story.
Me in first grade- Click for story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
Me in 3rd grade- Click for story.
Earthquake! Click to read story.
2014- Road trip to San Diego- Click for story.
The Psychedelic Experience- Click to read story.
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click for story.
2001 Trip to Cancun- Click to read story.
4th Grade- Click for story.
My Mother- Click for more photos.
1973 "You have to be hurt..." Click to read the story.
2005- Darlene Visits for Gay Pride- Click to read story.
5th Grade in Abilene Tx- Click for story
2005 Darlene Visit for Gay Pride- Click for story.
1958-1959- 3rd Grade- Click to read story.
1974- On Larkin Street- Click for story.
Where I was born- Click for story.
1967- Summer of Love- Click to read story.
1974- First Trip to Europe- Click to read story.
2015- 2nd Gay Cruise- Click to read story.
1970's Promiscuity- Click for story.
Summer of Love- Click to read story.
My Dad's Family- Click for story.
Second Gay Cruise- Click for story.